I just got really sad.
Every inch of me
is feeling left behind
like dust
like fog
like the air
that does not longer count.
But I know I am worthy
maybe not right now.
But I did matter
and I will matter again…
maybe just not right now.
But I did and I will.
Therefore
endlessly
I do matter…
but just not right now.
And that sadness
feeds my mind
with emptiness
with silence
with many words
that do not longer count
because
they can’t be heard
they won’t be heard
as I won’t say a word.
But I do feel sad
and my feelings
must remained inside
looked up behind that door
the one
that opens up for love
just when love comes
from those who don’t know
that I love them forever more.
I know I am worthy
I am worthy of their love
maybe not all the time
maybe just
from time to time
perhaps
just not right now.
It seems and it feels like
they do love me
because they do come and go.
But I rather them to stay with me
behind the door
in that space
that is filled
with sorrowed thoughts
every time they leave
and leave me all alone.
I do feel sad right now
in this space
where I do belong
but they will knock again
and again I will be happy
maybe just content
but I’ll be worthy again
and I’ll be here again
because from time to time
sadness is all what’s left.
By Carolina Gonzalez (Carolina Portilla Garcés)
March 3rd, 2014
2:30 PM – Plano, Texas
CarolinasWords 